I have however, so far:
- Got lost 3 times around the hospital
- Dealt with my consultant who was sadly rather dismissive, having been lovely the first time I met him
- Pissed myself laughing with Claire more than 3 times
- Been sent to accounts where there was general confusion and of course liberal doses of paper pushing and box ticking
- Ordered lunch from my chemo(less) chair – did anyone expect lunch menus on a chemo ward?!
- Been told many women actually gain weight on this chemo. Likely won’t be a problem for me since I don’t seem to be getting it anyway
- Found out I will have a great anti-emetic (no, not anti semetic as someone asked me earlier) drug
- Had my arm in a bucket of hot water
Apparently the actual chemo drugs take approximately 40 mins…sometime today…
aaaaagghhhh!!! Good thing you only have a minor ailment then.
eye roll, sighs, bear hugs (to Claire too)
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And Bene, a French female doc who was horrified that I wasn’t going to use the cold cap to prevent hair loss. It means literally having something freezing on your head throughout treatment and for 2 hours after….in her mind of course, anything was worth suffering for appearances!!
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I hope you told her your plan for a “keep your edge” tattoo!! Though I may force a cold cap on you if you go ahead with that.
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You had me laughing the whole way through your list above. But I have to say that I am perplexed about the bucket of hot water for your arm. Cleanliness? Getting the veins to pop? Counteracting the cold cap?! The thought of having a cold cap on your head…Brrrrrrrr-rain freeze for hours. Now THAT’S not a nice thought. And, no, I never knew they handed out menus to people waiting for chemo. And although never having undergone chemo myself, I’m still unsure about the chemo/food mix. Perhaps it’s some horrid, in-house, dastardly joke…”Yeah…give them chemo…throw in some food for good measure…freeze their effing hair to their head…and give them a bucket of hot water to throw them off their game…..” Saying all the above, all the love in the world to you. Cancer can just fuck off with itself now.
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Margaret – I think you have summed it up perfectly!! It is actually all a deliberate joke, along with horrified French docs, all convinced Claire and I were a lesbian couple (not of course that I wouldn’t be honored, if I weren’t hetero) and the general ignoring! Oh, and the talk from the nurse about condoms for 48 hours so not to poison your partner (that she didn’t believe I had) and contraception. I’m 49, chemo likely apparently to send me into menopause so let’s talk about contraception!!
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You really think Dr. ISIS would have left you hanging like this? Bring back Dr. ISIS!!
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Hahahahahaha!!! No, we would have been praying together 🙂
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