Or think, or say, a lot of the time these days. Random thoughts that float around my mind all together, mostly in a jumble and at the same time,  follow:

1. I am recovering from cancer.
2. What (very large) tattoo shall I get to celebrate when I am cancer free?
3. What excuse will I use for my forgetfulness and clumsiness post chemo?
4. I love The Man
5. The Man drives me fucking insane
6. I drive me fucking insane
7. How did I every get such an incredible daughter like Hayley?
8. Oh look – something soft – must touch it
9. Me: ‘I never knew there was a Wimpy here’. The Man ‘No, you never seem to every time we have passed it over the last 6 months’
10. Taxol is made from the Yew tree. The tree is killed in the process. I am sure there is a deep meaning behind that. Ho hum..got distracted again
11. Must pee. Oh, must wake up again and pee. Oh, should I get up and pee again, or do I really need to. Oh, yes I do, it was after all, 2 hours since the last time
12. Will I ever not have bad breath again?
13. Will the skin ageing effects of chemo be reversed or is that it? I seem to have developed a cockerel like part of my neck suddenly – I know, I’ll avoid looking at it and pretend its not there.
14. Can I hang onto whats left of my eyelashes and eyebrows for the next 11 weeks?
15. The cancer is going.
16. Must pee
17. I must plan things. Oh, what were the things I was meant to plan?
18. What will life be like without cancer? Will I take all the learnings or forget them?
19. Will I get fit again – how the hell can you lose so much muscle tone in such a short space of time?
20. I should be doing more. Perhaps later.
21. Where should I get that tattoo – just remembered I want to get one…
22. Must pee
23. In some ways, I quite like the haze
24. Fuck the haze, can’t remember my next thought
25. Bet my hair won’t grow back curly…so want it to…