645am, about to wake up kids for school, feeling tired but a whole lot better than day 3 post Taxol last week, wondering how The Man and I will juggle work, heading back to Amman on Sunday…

And the madness continues. Work have set up an HQ team to deal with the situation – a huge relief in one way since I have been carrying a lot of this alone for the past 6 months. Complete pain in another way as back to my job managing upwards massively, getting people up to speed and so on. However, I have decided to go with this for the next few weeks and see where it leads…so, back to Amman on Sunday for likely 3 or so weeks.

I am hoping that this big push will be effective and I will be able to take it a lot easier afterwards. However, in this line of work, that is always the aspiration and rarely the reality – you get over one thing, the next starts up. So it will be up to me to draw the lines for myself. The HQ team will likely all head to Jordan over the next week – no idea yet how long that will last, i.e. how long they will stay…and then see after that.

I am worried – I can feel my stress levels increasing again, waking every couple of hours, on alert – fearful I will crash like I did on EC when I was working like mad as well. Fearful The Man and I will explode. Hmmm, as I am writing, realising that fear/anxiety is back…good to realise, now need to do something about it.

Right now though, off to start the morning madness with the kids 🙂