With an infection of the seroma – which I learnt today is the fluid the body produces post trauma (in this case, surgery) to help the healing process. Or not it appears in my case.

So, hospital humour/fuck ups so far:

• Since being admitted to the Marsden yesterday around 5pm, I have had 4 nurses and 1 doc asking either how my arm is or to see my arm.
• The very sweet but more than slightly barking male night nurse who loves to chat during the night time antibiotics administrations. His favourite appears to be non stop talk when I am asleep until I wake up and respond
• The same nurse who’s 6am conversation this morning was about how a patient died here last night – well, at 4.30am. Unexpectedly. They apparently spent 2.5 hours trying to save them, but failed.
• A nurse who was too busy flirting with The Man to notice how fucking painful the cannula she was putting in was (my veins are shot and they took out the port during surgery..) and fucked up 2 vials of blood.
• Another nurse wondering how my lymphedema was. Back to the arm: which for the record, is fine
• A nurse yesterday who after 2 hours couldn’t find a special marker pen, so drew on my boob with biro. WTF re colouring/drawing on my boob?!?!
• A person waking me up at 7am to ask if I want tea. After I had just got back to sleep slightly traumatised post my patient death chat at 6am.
• The mad Mexican/Spanish matching Armani jeans and belt doctor who forgot to see me during morning rounds. Came back after I complained at 12.30pm because I was basically ignored by any medical staff from since 6am…including nurses forgetting to give me pain meds.
• Turns out the above mentioned Armani clad doc is a GI oncologist. Who clearly knows fuck all about breast cancer. So told me a whole lot of stuff that was nonsense.
• They had forgotten to tell my surgeon I was here until lunchtime today. She came and then proceeded to stick a large needle in my left, very sore and swollen breast, to remove some of the fluid build up. Suffice to say I took the codeine I had been resisting since admission very soon after that.

Oh bugger – literally as I am witting this, my one viable vein with the cannula in it has just collapsed. Because they took my blood pressure in that arm while the drip was also on. Fuck, fuck, fuck.